But just remembering that it’s not really about just having more motivation, it’s about uncovering more of the best kind of in motivation, which kind of speaking to intrinsic motivation. So we don’t necessarily want more motivation from external factors. We want them to be more motivated internally. So, and with that too, like you may notice with your clients or your clients may even notice this in themselves, that.

The more intrinsically and internally motivated they feel, suddenly the more determined. They become. But the reality is we just help them uncover more of their internal motivations for doing this stuff. Hello my friends, and welcome back to Not another Mindset show. I’m your host, Dr. Kasey Jo. My goal with this podcast is to take the science of mindset and behavior change and distill it down into actionable takeaways for you.

Together we’re gonna unpack research around motivation, self-sabotage, willpower, and so much more, and we’re going to take all of that and translate it into. Strategies you can immediately apply to your health, fitness, relationships, business, marketing clients, all of the things. But just to be clear, it’s not all serious and sciencey around here.

We’re gonna have a ton of fun too, and I’m so excited to share all of this with you. All right, let’s go ahead and get into the episode. Welcome back to not another mindset show. I’ve got an Ask Me Anything episode today for you. A bunch of random questions. I think last time we talked about everything from like, why are my clients making excuses to what are your favorite curly hair products?

So today we have yet another variety of questions to answer that you guys have submitted. And if you would like to submit a question for a future q and a episode and clearly. Anything goes. So if you wanna ask about my personal life, if you wanna ask about my favorite moisturizer, or you have a question about a specific client or a certain coaching strategy that you wanna run by me or get some more ideas on, please put your questions into the question form.

We have it linked in every single episode, so you can submit it there. Every once in a while. I will also post on my Instagram and say, Hey, here’s a question box. I’m gonna take the questions from here to use for my podcast episode. So if you’re not following me on Instagram. That’s where I like to hang out for the most part, on in social media land.

Like don’t find you will not find me. Actually, that’s a lie. You will find me on TikTok, but I don’t even real, I don’t even think I have the app on my phone because when my friends send me tiktoks, it has to open like in a web browser Anyway. As far as social media goes, if you wanna hang out, come over to my Instagram, which is also linked in the show notes of this episode and every episode.

Okay. So question number one, when you’re on a date, do you analyze their mindset? This is like, it’s such a classic question because I get this all the time. As soon as someone learns, I have a background in psychology, a PhD in psychology. It’s like, oh, are you analyzing me right now? And the truth is no.

Like I’m talking to you, I’m one human being talking to another human being. However, I can’t really fully turn it off either. So I will notice things. So if you say something very fixed mindset to me. You bet your butt. I’m thinking that was a very fixed mindset statement. Um, but I’m not analyzing, right?

It’s just like those things just sound off, like alarm bells in my head and I can’t really turn that off, but I’m not really paying it a ton of attention. Attention, if that makes sense. So when it comes to dating. I don’t, I’m not going into a date going like, all right, let’s see where this guy’s mindset is at.

It’s gonna determine everything. Um, but instead I do pay attention to how someone is. Talking about challenges or setbacks in their life, um, their interests in like personal growth and development. Um, because if you are pursuing those things and you are looking to grow and develop or the way that you’re describing challenges and setbacks as a partner, yeah, I’m looking for someone who has a growth mindset in those things, especially because I consider myself someone who has a growth mindset in those things.

Um. I also really like to ask, it’s not always like a first date question, but I do ask. What lessons that person has learned from like their most recent past relationship, especially if it was a longer relationship. Like what, what did you learn from it? And obviously if a relationship ended then there was probably still some like not so great feelings from it.

I mean, I don’t know if, is it possible for a relationship to end and both people are like a hundred percent happy? I mean, I suppose it, it could be. We we’re both just like entirely done. Let’s be friends. This is gonna be great. Um, actually I have had a relationship like that. But that doesn’t mean there wasn’t any like negative emotions associated with that relationship ending.

Anyway, I digress. This is the problem with these q and a episodes. ’cause I’m not like on a set outline schedule of things to talk about. Um, but when I asked that question like, what lessons have you learned? I have had situations where the guy sitting across from me will say something like, huh, like, I’ve never really thought about that before.

And to me that’s a little bit of like, it’s a baby red flag. Okay, a baby red flag. Because to me, I’m like, how have you not thought about what you learned from that relationship and what you got out of it and how it helped you grow? Because like that is so. Much. One of the first things that I’m gonna think about, about any situation, bad or good.

So if you’ve never thought about it before or man, guys, there was one situation. I actually really liked this guy. We went on one date and this was a year and a half ago, and his response to that was. Communication that he learned really great communication from his last relationship. And I was like, damn, that’s awesome.

Like that’s so great. And wouldn’t you know it the guy who ended up having terrible communication skills and not responding to me. So that’s something obviously that’s just like an integrity thing. Like don’t tell me that you learned this lesson and then it be the thing that you clearly are not doing.

So anyway, so yeah, I do. I do pay attention. I’m not necessarily analyzing is the short answer to that question. Okay. The next one, I see other women in science on Instagram talking about issues in their academic journey because they’re women. Did you experience this? Um. Not so much in academia to remember.

I am a psych PhD, and psychology is a lot of women in that field, whereas something maybe different like biology or chemistry or something like that, you may be more of the minority as most likely actually. I should probably, I was gonna say I should have brought stats to this podcast episode, but I don’t really prepare for these q and a episodes, so I literally could not have, um, I just sit down and answer the questions and talk to you guys, which is fun for me.

And I hope it’s fun for you too, because I enjoy these episodes, but, and then I just go on tangents and talk like I’m talking right now, which is somewhat of a problem, but we can’t clean it up. We want this to be raw and real and unfiltered. Right. Um, so. Probably different than someone who is going through like a, I guess a harder science versus soft science.

Whereas in the psych department at NC State where I did my PhD, it was mostly women. So it would be odd to feel like I’m being discriminated against as a woman when our entire department is Mosley women. So, not so much in academia because I was surrounded by so many women, we were the majority. But when it comes to business, that definitely has happened.

Um, I’ve talked about this on my Instagram before, and I did like one of those trends. It was the, what was the, the god forbid trend that was like, like, oh, you did so and so, like, God forbid I did this thing. You know? And it’s usually like something beneficial. So. I don’t remember. This is like so bad. Um, I’m like, so sorry you guys have to listen to my gears turning right now, but it was.

God forbid I am like a hot female in a successful business or something. And my entire caption was about, yes, I know I just like, called myself hot, but like, it was like, God forbid, I’m like, good looking and smart at the same time type of thing. Because, because, because, because, because the comments that I had been getting on my ads.

Where there is photos of me and people commenting and saying, oh, what does this young girl know anything about psychology Or, yeah, like, what does this pretty face have to say about mindset? Like, I’ve lived so many more years than her and all of this stuff. And yeah, so that has, uh, definitely happened. I also, I’m like, recollecting this memory.

It’s not a good one. I during, it was like during a health mindset coaching, certification, enrollment period. I do open up calls on my calendar so you guys can talk to me and make sure it’s a good fit for you before you decide to enroll. And those enrollment weeks, it’s like a Monday through Thursday, Monday through Friday is just.

So exhausting. Like we’re talking like 15 hour days, sometimes more. It’s just, it’s so much like, I call it jokingly HMCC hell week, but it is so exciting and so fun at the same time. Um, you just gotta like really go in for a handful of days. Um, I’m like experiencing all of the emotions of those weeks right now.

And so the calls that I open up. It was my last call on Thursday night with someone and I’m getting on. I’m like, okay, I’ve just done like 25 calls in the last two days on top of everything else. Like gonna talk to this person, gonna see how I can help them, help them make a confident decision of whether or not they want to enroll.

And I’m not kidding when I tell you she spent 30 minutes giving me backhanded compliments and. Telling me about how she’s been in the fitness coaching industry for 25 years and she knows all of this stuff, and it feels a little bit weird for me to be saying that I know more than her. And I’m like, where is this coming from?

But guys, I just sat back and listened and nodded and told her that I understood her and I hear her, but it’s just like, again, because I am younger than you, that automatically makes me less of an expert. Expert in mindset and behavior change. Like I, I don’t know. So that definitely does happen. Let’s go to the next question.

Without a coaching company, what’s next for you in your business? Um, I’ve mentioned this before. I had a one-on-one health and fitness coaching company. For those of you who maybe are just tuning in, don’t know me that well, even just. Started following along the podcast or Instagram within the last year.

You maybe don’t even know. Um, I, I talk about it enough though, but I had a one-on-one health and fitness coaching company for a long, I mean, a really long time if we think about it. ’cause I’ve been coaching since 2016 and then turned it into a larger company, hired on assistant coaches, had a whole staff everything.

And recently, October of last year, so October of. 2020, whatever, 2024, decided to make the decision to go all in on the certification because I was so spread thin, focusing on the coaching business and the certification. So this question is essentially like, Hey, you don’t have the coaching company anymore.

What are you gonna do? And to be honest, we are busier than ever, and I don’t even know. How it was possible that I had a coaching. I, I am recording this podcast episode on a Saturday evening because I didn’t have time in my week to do it. So. Like how would it even been possible to continue to do what we’re doing and also have the coaching company?

But that’s what I was already feeling. Right. So honestly though, we’re focusing a lot on growing what we already have and not reinventing the wheel. Things that maybe kind of got put on the back burner for a while, for instance. Um, our Health Mindset coaching certification. We have an alumni group for people who have graduated, but want to continue to just like hone their skills, get continued access to the program, and any updates we make, things like that.

That was something that we just an offer we had and we did it well, but we just didn’t market it super well or talk about it a lot and wanted to like give more attention to that. So we’ve done that. I have a lot of DIY programs and workshops, things that you can like pay $97 and sit down over a weekend and learn about how to insert mindset and motivation into your copywriting and your messaging.

That is magnetic messaging. That is that program that I’m speaking to and. We have all these things and they’re incredible. They’re awesome. Very low barrier to entry for people to start to get into this stuff. But I didn’t really ever talk about it ’cause we didn’t really have a plan. ’cause we had a whole coaching company to run.

So stuff that we’re focusing on that lacked focus, we are now focusing on, and I guess like, okay, this person asked like, what’s next for you in your business? I mean, that’s just like what we’re immediately next down the line. I do have. Some fantasies about doing more like real business to business stuff and going into other businesses and helping coach leadership or teams on growth versus fixed mindset.

So doing essentially like growth mindset trainings in a business inside a team to help them. Kind of cultivate a better company culture to perform better, to see more results. All the things that we’re kind of like doing on a micro scale, not even micro. I mean, HMCC is getting pretty large and we’ve had over 800 coaches go through the program.

But kind of what we do when we’re teaching coaches how. Coach their clients. This would be like from a leadership perspective and like an internal team’s perspective. So maybe someday one day it’s on kind of like my, my bigger, broader wishlist. Okay. Next one. Is it better to tell clients that they need more motivation or more determination?

I’ve heard arguments for both. Um, okay. First thing that comes up for me, it’s not necessarily even part of this. Question, but it’s in the question we shouldn’t be telling our clients what’s more important to them. They should actually be the ones who are telling us. We should be looking in between the lines of their coaching check-ins and what they’re saying to us.

And are they using the word motivation or determination? Are they saying I need more determination? I know motivation’s not important. Like what are your clients saying to you rather than you deciding what needs to be more important for them. So I think also with that too. Making sure we understand how our clients are defining these terms.

So is motivation like a, a feeling of I want a desire to do something, whereas determination is, it’s something that I feel like I have to do and I should do it even, and I have to do it no matter what, even if I don’t want to. This is just an example, right? But your clients are going to have different definitions for these concepts and better understanding where they’re coming from.

So if they’re saying, I need more motivation, like, well, tell me what that looks like. What does that mean? How would your life look different on a day-to-day basis if you had more motivation? And just better understand what the, where they’re coming from. ’cause that’s how you can coach them best. And I think ultimately too, like reminding you guys.

I did a podcast episode on this recently, like the best type of motivation is the name of the episode. But just remembering that it’s not really about just having more motivation, it’s about uncovering more of the best kind of in motivation, which kind of speaking to intrinsic motivation. So we don’t necessarily want more motivation from external factors.

We want them to be more motivated internally. So, and with that too. You may notice with your clients, or your clients may even notice this in themselves, that the more intrinsically and internally motivated they feel, suddenly the more determined they become. But the reality is we just help them uncover more of their internal motivations for doing this stuff.

Okay. Next one. How did you like the F1 movie? Um, I am a Formula One fan, loud and proud. I’m actually not just a Formula One fan. I am a McLaren racing fan. And. Lando Norris is my boy. Also a big Oscar Pry fan. Those are the two. For those of you who have no idea what I’m talking about, those are the two drivers for McLaren racing in Formula One.

And currently as I’m recording this podcast, I’m not sure when this episode’s coming out, if it’s near the end of the year or what, but it is, um. July currently, and Oscar and Lando are battling for the driver’s championship and I’m fairly certain McLaren has it in the bag for the Constructors championship, which is the team winning.

I feel like I almost need to do more explanation ’cause this makes no sense unless you’re a Formula One fan. But then if you’re not, you’re like, I don’t want more explanation. Kasey, can we move on to the next question? But as a driver, there’s 20 drivers and 10 teams, so two drivers per team and each team.

Wins a championship together. Those two drivers together are AC accruing points throughout the season. So as a team, McLaren can win, but then there’s a driver’s championship. So those two drivers on McLaren are actually battling each other while simultaneously, simultaneously working together to support the team.

So anyway, at this point in the season, Lando and Oscar, the two drivers. For McLaren are battling, they’re super close for winning the driver’s championship, but together they’re a powerhouse. And McLaren is just like sweeping the floors that everybody else. Um, so that, oh my God, the F1 movie. I guess that’s the question that was asked, right?

Um, the racing scenes were so fun. The director who did the most recent Top Gun movie, he is the one who directed the Formula One movie. So I knew it was like the racing scenes are gonna be so fun, and it was so fun to watch in the theater too. And I will say like the plot was a little bit mediocre and predictable.

Um. I didn’t really love, I actually saw this as a review of the movie and I was like, damn, I actually see that. So it wasn’t my original thought, but then reflecting, I was like, that makes so much sense. Like the betrayal of women in the movie was kind of not great. Um, there’s like, I don’t wanna spoil it if you guys still wanna watch it, and I hopefully I just convinced you to become a Formula One fan.

Um, but there’s like two. Women. One is a mechanic, not a mechanic. She’s a one, she’s part of the pit crew. And she like messes up at some point. And also one of the main characters is a woman. And it’s like she is to some degree, like willing to throw away her career to like sleep with one of the drivers.

It’s, yeah, anyway, you just gotta watch it. Okay. But I’m like, those are the two female roles that are portrayed in, they’re both not, yeah, don’t really love the portrayal. But um, yeah, in general though, I think. Having Brad Pitt is the, the main character just. To showcase like how large this movie is and like what they were trying to do with it.

But I do think it’s obviously gonna bring more fans to the sport, which is great to a degree, until all of the Grand Prix tickets just are more expensive than they already are, which is already insane. But, um, it’s a great, it’s a, it’s a great movie if you don’t know anything about Formula One. If you do, it’s fun because there’s a lot of like little hidden Easter eggs and jokes that are tossed throughout.

Where if you were a fan, you’re like, oh my god, that’s funny. I love that they did that. So, okay. That’s probably enough about that. Um, can you give us a cliche, but very real piece of advice that we all need health-wise. I mean, very cliche, but very real piece of advice from a health perspective. Focus on the basics and don’t over complicate it, is what I would say.

Um. We want to jump to extremes and do like whole 30 and 21 day fixes and all of this stuff. And you guys know this ’cause so many of you are coaches who are listening to this and that is not what is what long-term lasting behavior changes built on these, like short-term, really extreme bouts of things like that’s not realistic for your life forever.

So focus on the basics, don’t overcomplicate it. I think that that’s. What I have to say about that? Um, what made you get into what you’re advocating? So why did I get into mindset and behavior change? Honestly. Kind of started with the bodybuilding.com forums back in 2011, probably where I got a little bit more serious, a lot more serious, honestly, with my own health and fitness journey, and just fell in love with nutrition and fitness and all of the things in between.

And I was studying psychology in my undergrad at the time and started to just have these thoughts of like, wow, this stuff is really turning around my life. Like being. I’m gonna use that word dedicated to my nutrition and fitness and my health and all of this stuff is really, has so many amazing carryover benefits to other aspects of my life.

Like why are more people not doing this? And it’s not a knowledge problem. People know they need to exercise and need healthy, but they’re still not doing it even though they know all of these benefits, like, what’s going on here? So kind of putting those things together. I decided to pursue a PhD in psychology and focus on health behavior change.

I came across the mindset lab at NC State, and honestly, the rest is history. I didn’t know a single thing about mindset science when I was applying to PhD programs. I was like, mindset is a science. There’s like. Research on this stuff. Like who knew? Um, and kind of like fell into that world, which is so interesting.

Just like there’s that trend on Instagram right now where it’s like, you can’t tell me the butterfly effect isn’t real if I didn’t blah, blah, blah. And it’s like, if I didn’t literally just like land in the mindset lab at NC State, ’cause that wasn’t a specific thing I was seeking out. And now. The number of times I say the world, the word mindset on a day-to-day basis, and it’s literally my entire business, right?

Crazy. I should actually probably do that Instagram trend. It’s like my. My team is always talking about like Kasey, pay attention to the trends and do all the things. And I’m like, I just don’t, I don’t actually don’t spend very much time on Instagram and like sometimes that’s to my detriment, but Okay.

Final question. Hey Coach Kasey, do you have any plans to publish a book regarding mindset based off of the core principles learned throughout the learned throughout the HMCC program? And this actually came from Omar. He left his name, he was like, remember I’m in HMCC and I know I remember you, Omar, I totally remember you.

Um. Books. I’m laughing because I actually have close to a hundred pages of a book written on this stuff, and I started it in 2021 would kind of get away from it. Come back. I had, um. A book coach who was connecting me with agents and we were trying to figure out like the best route to go, but we just played around so much with like, is this going to be for like general population behavior change what they need, or is this going to be geared towards coaches and what they need to know?

Um, so to be honest, to answer the questions, do I have plans to publish a book? At this point, no, even though I have a hundred page pages written, but I do think I would have to go back and revise and figure out the direction that I wanted to go. And it’s just, it’s hard because, I mean, it was hard for a few reasons.

Um, first of all, when going, ’cause I was going the traditional publishing route, it’s like, if I’m gonna do this, I wanna do it like the real, the real right way. And hopefully turn this into like a revenue stream rather than just like, I could self-publish any time. Right. Um. But difficulties being in, ’cause the space that this book would live in is like the self-help space most likely.

And it’s a really hard space to like get into and rise to the top and do well in. ’cause there’s just so many different avenues that you can go in that realm. And also, ah. Like a not so fun thing to talk about, but just so you guys know a little bit behind the scenes of like what this process even starting it looks like when going to agents that want to pick up my idea and liked the idea, which there were a handful of them.

The biggest issue that they had was that I don’t have a big enough Instagram following. Isn’t that crazy? Like that’s what they actually care about. ’cause they know, they’re like, if we publish your book, we want you to be able to help marketing it. If you don’t have a big enough audience, then like, maybe we don’t wanna work with you.

Like, ew. Because it’s so frustrating to me because I know for certain that with my measly 45 to 50,000 followers wherever I’m at right now, um, I am doing a very good job with marketing and my business is. Very profitable and we make a lot of money doing what we do compared to a lot of people who have hundreds of thousands of followers.

So it’s not really. About your follower count as much as it is about like, do you actually know how to sell shit? So it’s, it was a really frustrating process and I just like, I felt just annoyed by all of that and not really being heard or seen in that regard too. So anyway, it’s been a couple years since I’ve even really thought about it until this question if I’m being so honest.

So I would really like to write a book someday. I actually, fun fact, when I was younger, I loved writing, loved it so much, and I wrote like. Two halves, two separate books, halves, halves of a book that were fiction, um, when I was young. And I would love to get back to that. It’s just as I’m recording this podcast on a Saturday evening, again, it’s like, with what time Kasey?

Um, but maybe if responsibilities can be diluted a little bit more for me in the company and we get to a spot where it makes more sense, like going back to that would be great. I do wanna do it eventually. Just don’t know. Can’t tell you when. Could be three years, could be 30 years. We don’t know. All right.

That is, that is the final question that I have on my list of questions here this time. Again, if you would like to ask a question of me next time, please ask it. Don’t be shy. There is a podcast form in the show notes of this episode and in every episode where you can drop your questions. So if you’re ever listening to an episode of mine and you’re like, huh, I have a question about that.

Go to the show notes of the episode and ask the question so I can answer it for you. Okay. Um, yeah, I say that like, because we only have a handful of questions every time I go to grab them from these forms. And I’m like, guys, I know you have questions ’cause you’re in my dms asking me them like, get into the podcast review form, ask more, um, because I wanna answer them for you.

And I have fun with this, so, all right. That is all I have for you. No more questions to be answered for now. Until next time, I appreciate you being here. Thank you for listening even through all of my Formula One bullshit. You’re the best and I will see you next week. And that’s a wrap for today’s episode of Not Another Mindset Show.

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Or just wanna connect, hang out, chat a little bit. Come find me on Instagram. I’m Coach Kasey, Jo over there. That is where I hang out the most in the land of social media. Alright, my friends, that is all I have for you this time. I so appreciate you being here and love to see you prioritizing your growth.

I’ll see you next time.